From Within

Chapter Thirteen

Christmas had been and gone, new year had begun and Vicky's progress on the hormones was a very positive factor, having been on them for around five months come March of 2000, and of course that was not the only anniversary; as it now meant Vicky and Alex still being together, had been so for five months as well.  Physically Vicky was enjoying the potent effects the hormones were having, being young, the effects were felt much quicker and more effective.  Her skin had become softer and definitely of a more feminine texture and glow and she began to feel her hips begin to widen and again soften, her face had slightly changed its appearance as well, but these were all gradual things that she was truly beginning to enjoy the effects that she had so longed for were finally beginning to take place.  She had long given up on the daily updating of Emily or Ellen, it just lapsed and no longer did she feel the need to scrutinise her looks either to look for changes, she was confident and happy with her life and herself at long last.


She had paid another visit to her psychiatrist in the time that had past, back in January who was keeping a close eye on her progress, but coming up to half a year full time, it was only a matter of time that she could hopefully start the process of having the final surgery, which at last did not seem an impossibility or a mere dream; but a reality and indeed as said, just a matter of time.  However Vicky did not like to dwell on it, most of the day it wasn't an issue to her at all, except morning and night when she was graphically reminded of the deformity below, but it was out of sight and out of mind most of the time.  College was also going fine as was her social life, which was something she was still enjoying having.  She worked hard and achieved good results, but that did not stop her letting her hair down in the evening and going out to a club, or to the cinema and maybe even indulging in some shopping when she had managed to get some money together.  Emily had only just split up with Darren, and it was quite clear that she was upset about this for quite a few weeks, as it was him who had dumped her, and it was her first boyfriend.  However, Ellen and Vicky stuck by her in this time which Emily felt a bit down and sorry for herself, it scared Vicky seeing Emily down, she had never seen her chirpy happy sister down before.  Well, maybe upset because James had hidden one of her dolls when she was younger  - but nothing compared to poor Emily at the moment.  One evening Vicky decided to see if she was a bit more chatty, she had not been very talkative in the past few weeks.  Vicky knocked her door lightly and her Emily inside mumble quietly, she was just laying on her bed reading a magazine.


"Hey Ems, still not feeling good huh?" Vicky said closing the door quietly behind her and perching on her bed.

"Does it look it?" answered Emily sarcastically, then realising that her sister was only there trying to help. "Sorry, I didn't mean that" she continued as she put her magazine down and sat up.

"Don't be sorry, I know your upset and fed up with me and mum always nagging you trying to help, but I just don't like seeing my sister so down and upset" Vicky said putting her arm around Emily.

"It's ok, I don't mind, but you're both too kind" said Emily still looking down on herself.

"Now now!  It's only because we all love you and hate seeing you like this Ems, and that is never too much to ask" Vicky smiled at her trying to reassure her that she was not a burden.

"Thanks sweetie" Emily said managing a little smile.

"When was the last time you saw your friends out of school anyway?" asked Vicky.

"I haven't since me and well, you know, split up, I can't be bothered, it's too much effort" Emily sighed. 


Vicky felt a shiver down her spine, remembering herself saying similar things in years gone by, can't be bothered, too much effort, she could understand completely how that felt and it was never good.  Problem was, empathising with the feelings Emily was expressing was also vividly disturbing in a way, she pretty much knew how Emily was feeling and it was distressing.


"I guess you must have really liked him, huh?" Vicky questioned further, knowing it was a difficult subject to touch upon; something of a raw nerve, but she had to start working things out for Emily.

"No I hate him" Emily snapped back, again reeling back, it was a raw nerve, she paused and bit her lip "I didn't mean to snap at you, Sorry, I'm sorry" she paused, noticing Vicky was smiling unscathed with a comforting look but noticeably trying to draw out what Emily really felt "I really liked him and I thought he liked me and all he could do was send me a text message to dump me..." she said beginning to sob.

"Hey hey babes!" said Vicky reaching out to hug Emily "You have to let it all out and get it out of you, cry, shout, scream as much as you like, because things will get better and I'll make darn sure of it!" Vicky smiled with a plan in her mind.

"But how could he do something like it, he could have told me face to face, now he just looks away from me at school when I see him and it hurts so much" sobbed Emily.

"I know, I know... When me an Seb split up, ok it wasn't as bad as this, but I felt down, and you know there will always be somebody else. someone more special, more loving..." and the she joked "...and even sexier with more money" she laughed, seeing it bring a smile to Emily's face.

"I know you are so right, but it's hard to see it now" quipped Emily.

"Yes, I can understand that, but I'm going to help you move on, so that a lucky, more deserving bloke is one day going to see you and sweep you off your feet, now your going to get dressed after getting in that shower, and we are going to go shopping madam, and have some fun" Vicky smiled broadly, standing up hands on hips, firmly.

Emily chuckled and smiled standing up to giver her sister a big hug and a kiss.

"You know sis, you really are a right bossy one aren't you" Emily said smiling as she walked towards the bathroom.

"I know, that's what big sisters are for!" Vicky smiled, closing Emily's door behind her to finish getting ready herself.


Emily soon emerged from the bathroom, hair washed and looking a lot better for herself in just getting washed, she dried her hair and Vicky pulled some clothes out of the wardrobe for her, it was a bright day outside and warm, Vicky had been shopping only the past weekend but still had time for more, she herself was dressed in a simple strappy pink top and white zip up jacket and again a small denim skirt .which Ellen frowned at first, but soon realised if that's what she liked!  However, Alex shall we say - he kind of like legs on his women and it was no different when it came to his girlfriend and what he preferred her in.  Vicky pulled out some similar clothes for Emily to make the best of her, again a slightly longer denim skirt, darker in colour, with a plain coloured primrose yellow top and her denim jacket.  She threw them towards Emily who picked them up and smiled at Vicky, for making her do something, rather than moping around.  She dried her hair, put on the clothes and took the time to put some makeup on (something she hadn't done in the past few weeks since she lacked all effort and interest in herself.  Eventually she got the thumbs up from Vicky and off the two girls trotted downstairs.


"Off somewhere are we" said Ellen pleased to see Emily looking a bit more like herself.

"We're going into town to do some shopping!" beamed Vicky.

"Again, I mean you only went..." Ellen tailed off realising it was a good thing for Emily "well, have a good time, let's hope the retail therapy does some good!" Ellen smiled, reach over to give the two girls a peck on the cheek.  "Be safe you two, ok!" Ellen yelped as they shut the front door.  She just nodded and wondered whether Vicky was a good or bad influence at times.  Ellen had the whole house to herself.  So she put the kettle on, made a nice cup of tea and sat down to put her feet up in the lounge.  And just as she did, in came James' friends from football practice, the loud lads had descended and Ellen never did get her moment's peace and quiet!


"So what are you looking for today Vicky?" Emily asked as they sat on the bus on the way into town.

"Not sure, got most of the things I wanted last week, but probably another pair of jeans and a cap or something, but more importantly missy, what are you looking for?" she asked.

"Oh the usual, 6' tall, handsome, dark hair..." joked Emily, cheeky soul she was.  Vicky sighed and smiled broadly at her

"Now if I saw a bit more of that now and again I'd be a very happy sister!" she laughed.

"What the 6' fella?" Emily continued to joke.

"No...." Vicky paused "...well yes, but that's not what I meant, oh well, I'm just glad to see you a bit more like, well, you!" she continued.

"Thanks sis" said Emily giving her sister a little peck on the cheek.  However behind them sat a bunch of thirteen year old lads, Emily's age and even the slightest sign of two women being affectionate caused them to joke, rather loudly.

"Hey Lesbians!" shouted one of them.  Emily and Vicky froze, that was a bit unexpected!  What should they do, ignore it or try and get one better.  But as they were quickly plotting Emily turned around and saw with them, Darren, the big grin on his face soon turned to horror as he tried to look away.  Emily knew she had to say something, and sure enough she did.

"Well after going out with you Darren, it's enough to make any girl a lesbian, looser boy!" Emily said striking out with rare venom, Vicky sat their mouth wide open not believing for one moment.  Quietness descended, between the girls and the lads at the back.  Until the rest of the lads turned around at Darren and started laughing at him.  Within the three Jeffries girls, that being Ellen, Vicky and Emily - their lay a very bitchy streak that hardly ever was called upon from their mouse-like ways, but when they struck - the victim knew about it.  Vicky looked at Emily grinning and whispered in her ear "You gotta teach me how to strike out like that honey!" she laughed.

"No problem, but I think this is our stop!" answered Emily.


The two girls got off the bus and waved cheekily up at the lads, who were quite red-faced by the events on the bus, none the less they started their shopping trip and time flew by.  Emily looked so much happier and much more like herself again.  Come lunch time the girls had pretty much found all the bargains they could hope for, plenty of tops, Vicky found some very nice flared jeans with pretty decals and designs on them, ideal for going out, and Emily found some very cute pink trainers, and the essential wardrobe item - the small black dress.  She bought it with no occasion in mind, just that she loved it and went for it.  The two crashed out in a nearby coffee shop and had something to eat and a drink to recharge their batteries.  They had decided to go to the cinema later on to complete the day, but would have to see if dad could pick them up, after all they didn't fancy the thought of carrying shopping bags to the bus station at six o' clock.  As they sat in the bay window of the coffee shop.  Emily noticed Alex walk by outside and immediately without thinking tapped on the window to him, of course it had not escaped Vicky's attention.


"Be back in a mo sis!" she jumped out of her seat and collared him outside, and gave him a little peck on the cheek and led him into where they were sitting.

"Hi Ems" Alex said as he pulled up a seat.  "You feeling better, Vicky said you have been having a bad time" he smiled making conversation.

"Yes... didn't know Vicky had told you, well I'm feeling better now thanks, and I suppose you can see we are shopping today!" she smiled.  Alex looked to the floor and the numerous bags, Alex looked around at Vicky

"I hope these aren't all yours, we only went last week you know" he joked.

"And?" Vicky smiled back ready to playfully poke her tongue out at him.

"Oh well what do I know, I suppose it's ok if I grab a drink" Alex asked looking at the time.

"Yeah sure, we haven't finished eating yet anyway" Vicky said, just before Alex got up she have him another kiss.

"Hey Emily, I hope Alex turning up isn't upsetting, it wasn't planned at all!" Vicky said just making sure Emily was fine.

"It's no problem at all for me so don't worry!" Emily smiled.


Alex came back and plonked himself down with a coffee, took a big slurp only to cause some laughter from the girls as they realised his cappuccino froth was all over the tip of his nose.


"What!?" he exclaimed.

"Oh nothing" giggled Emily wanting to make the most of the moment in a humorous manner, Vicky burst out in laughter again only to draw the attention of the whole coffee shop at this point.  People turned around and smirked at poor Alex, who immediately after that caught on and, grabbing a napkin and wiping his nose.

"What did I ever do to you, especially you Emily" he joked.

"Oh, don't get me started!" she laughed back.

"Ok I’m going to be quiet now because you always have something to get the better of me!" he sighed, though smiling.

"So honey, what have you been doing today in town?" asked Vicky who had stopped laughing by this point.

"Ahh well just in town with a few of the guys, checking out this new football game for the Playstation, it's really cool, and you can do all these moves, and the graphics wow they are out of this world, super cool 3D modelling..." he tailed off noticing Vicky though lost interest at the moment he uttered Playstation, was just smiling into his eyes.  Emily got up to go to the loo, and that was Vicky’s, and admittedly Alex's chance as well.  She leaned over and gave him a big kiss on his lips, and sat back.


"I couldn't do that with Em's around, what with her in such a fragile state of mind, hope you understand" Vicky explained.

"Yeah sure, it's totally fine, you know you're a very good sister to be there for her in such tough times."  Alex said admiringly.

"Hey well she has been there from the start for me with absolutely everything and this is nothing compared to that!" she explained.

"Well I think it's great you two get on so well" he smiled.


Emily wandered back and nudged Vicky as if to say 'hurry up!' as they only had a couple of hours left shopping before going on to the cinema.


"Hey look babe we're off to do more shopping, and time is getting on" Vicky said picking up her bags.

"Ok that's fine, well I was only on my way back to the bus station anyway so  that's fine, I'll give you a call tonight, yeah?" said Alex.

"Sure that's great", Vicky paused waiting for Emily to pick all her bits and pieces up. "Ready sis?" she asked.

"Yip, ready to go!" said Emily

"I'll speak to you soon then honey" Vicky said as she reached out to kiss Alex.

"Yeah, will do!" Alex answered "And Em's take care of yourself too!" he continued, he was so sweet and loving.  He wasn't the far too nice kind of guy as he could be laddish, he was exciting, funny, but he was sensitive, caring and loving.  This was obviously what set Vicky's heart pounding when it came to Alex.

"Thanks, you too, and look after my sister!" Emily joked as they left the coffee shop.


The day past quickly enough and as planned they went to the cinema to watch a film, and by the end of it they were dropping.  Vicky had phoned Chris up much earlier on and low and behold, their knight in shining armour, dad, turned up to pick them up.  Just before they got in the car Emily gave Vicky a huge hug and began to cry a little.


"Vicky, you are the best sister ever! Thank-you so much for everything" she said sniffling away.

"Hey it's nothing and it's not as if I need any persuading to go shopping now is it?" she smiled.

"No, but you could have done whatever you wanted to do today but you spent it with me" Emily continued.

"Today I did do what I wanted to, and not only that, just you remember I have thirteen years to make up to you for all the times you have been there for me!" she said holding both her hands.  "So when we get back, we're going to have fish and chips, because I told mum I'd get them in and that will be our perfect day" Vicky smiled again.

"I cannot believe you were once honestly thought of as a boy!  You are the coolest!" she yapped out.

"SSSSSHHHHH!" Vicky laughed.

"Ooops... sorry!" said Emily quite forgetting no one else around knew.

"Don't worry, you're forgiven" Vicky said.


The two girls jumped in the car as Chris pulled up and told him all about their bargains and their day.  Of course, his entire input was mainly ‘yes’ or ‘that’s nice’ when really he was thinking “Wonder what’s for dinner” or something else, but most of all, at least he was thinking “thank goodness I have two happy daughters back!”


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